Let’s get this straight, I don’t dance or sing. Okay, let me be more accurate: I don’t sing or dance in public. Is it me? Or is the world lousy with shows about talented and not so talented people singing and dancing? I am beginning to hate television. Do know what that really means? Me? Hate television?
Here are my (yes I admit) very arbitrary rules:
Movies about the street smart high school student who break dances (or is it called street dancing? I am showing my age here) in his/her spare time and wants to go “legit” and wants to do competitive dancing? No thanks..pass
Movie about a tough, but gorgeous Pittsburgh woman who is a welder on the docks, dances at a club, and wants to get into ballet school.. heck yes
Television program where people compete by singing or dancing? I will only watch it if zombies, ninja’s, and ax wielding weirdo’s are chasing them while doing so
Movie where “Wolverine” is singing? Seriously Wolverine? Your killing me here. Next
Weddings, family gatherings, party’s, whatever where “public dancing” is not only encouraged but might be expected of all able bodied party attendees? Keep walkin mac.. aint gonna happen
Karaoke night at a local bar: heck yeah..let’s go.. get your shoes on.
So what you’re saying is that “Breakin'” and “Electric Bugaloo” are also not your cup of tea. What about “America’s Got Talent?” There is a whole spectrum of odd “talent” there. I have to watch “The Voice” myself bc of Blake Shelton, bc he draws women like honey to the bees. But Wolverine should not sing. That’s not manly or animally. Wolverine is not Danny from “Grease.”
Notice I made absolutely sure I included John Heder aka Napoleon Dynamite doing his dorky dance. A very young and dorky me became disenchanted with Break dancing movies, break dancing, and trying to moon walk and was so dorky in fact I made up my own parody of “Breaking up is hard to do” by Neil Sedaka called: “Break dancing is hard to do” I tried to break dance but All alone I have cried silent tears full of pride In a world made of steel, made of stone. Well I hear the music, close my eyes, and I have no rhythm. So I do in fact watch “America’s Got Talent” (and hope to be a contestant one day.. so keep watching) only because I am hoping someone will sneeze all over Howie Mandel.
Ha! He is hosting w/ Kelly Ripa right this second on TV, and I am secretly hoping that as well. Props for Irene Cara lyrics.