Under the influence of caffiene

Caffeine: lovely, fantastic, beautiful caffeine. I owe (blame?) most of my best barrbed comments, wittiest comebacks, and awe-inspired (at least that’s what I claimed in my submission for a pulitzer prize) work. While I am at it I can blame caffeine for the rotten, no good, truly awful open mouth insert foot stuff I allegedly may have said or posted.

Someone or something has to take the credit and heat for all of that. Taking personal accountability would be asking way too much and also gives me a very flimsy excuse or story for the kind police officer who pulled me over and suspects I may have working, walking, blogging, and thinking while under the influence of caffeine. (Nothing to see here officer, just me holding a voluptious cold energy drink can in my hand as if I was holding the ring of power from Lord Of The Rings saying in my Golum voice: “My precious… My precious”)

Caffeine comes in so many forms it may cause someone who had a problem or addiction with it (gosh I really hope those kind of people just get real and get some help) to wonder to themselves what exactly would be the best way to deliver the benefits of caffiene?

Only for the benefit of this blog I have done research (investigative work?) on the matter. Mountain Dew is a good stand by, coffee is such a gift (dear Starbucks: your coffee is way too expensive) and Monster energy drinks have always been my favorite.

Sleep depravation is a cruel joke invented by late night talk shows, QVC, golden girls marathons, and commercials about your medicare options. Life is short, stay awake for it.