Perpetually uncomfortable in a world that constantly wants to sing or dance

napoleon-dynamite1

Let’s get this straight, I don’t dance or sing. Okay, let me be more accurate: I don’t sing or dance in public. Is it me? Or is the world lousy with shows about talented and not so talented people singing and dancing? I am beginning to hate television. Do know what that really means? Me? Hate television?

Here are my (yes I admit) very arbitrary rules:

Movies about the street smart high school student who break dances (or is it called street dancing? I am showing my age here) in his/her spare time and wants to go “legit” and wants to do competitive dancing? No thanks..pass

Movie about a tough, but gorgeous Pittsburgh woman who is a welder on the docks, dances at a club, and wants to get into ballet school.. heck yes

Television program where people compete by singing or dancing? I will only watch it if zombies, ninja’s, and ax wielding weirdo’s are chasing them while doing so

Movie where “Wolverine” is singing? Seriously Wolverine? Your killing me here. Next

Weddings, family gatherings, party’s, whatever where “public dancing” is not only encouraged but might be expected of all able bodied party attendees? Keep walkin mac.. aint gonna happen

Karaoke night at a local bar: heck yeah..let’s go.. get your shoes on.